Feeling Loved

I was feeling so much love today, on my birthday and felt really drawn to writing about it. As many of you know, I have recently uprooted and moved West, to beautiful Victoria, BC. This month has been all about new challenges, discovery and constant acceptance of change. When traveling to new places and embarking on new adventures, I am always conscious to keep an open mind and be welcoming to new experiences. I believe that by setting expectations, one can become disappointed if things don't work out, or these expectations are not met. This is the reason I keep such an open mind and allow things to unfold naturally. Upon finishing school and the many adventures I had throughout the past 4 years, I have really come to know and understand myself - who I am, what my goals and interests are, and where this life may take me. I am content with myself and, at least thought, I was closer to figuring out the next years of my life. But it turns out it doesn't matter how many amazing life changing experiences you have, or how much you feel like you understand yourself, everyday is a learning experience and everyday since I have been in Victoria I have learned something new about myself and about the world - it just never stops! A good friend put it well when she said, 'it's a lifelong process' of learning, constant discovery and constant reevaluation of where you're at and where you want to go. This, I have realized since being here, is completely true. I have overcome the frustration of being in new and unknown territory and remembered patience - a virtue that has revealed itself along my travels, when adjusting to new cultures, new people and new places. I have also realized that this time, I really am doing it on my own. Having resources at my disposal at the University of Guelph was such a blessing and once I got comfortable, I used them frequently; however, here in Victoria, it is up to me to go out and find what I am looking for. So that's exactly what I have been doing. And from here the learning never ends, the self-discovery is constant and my eyes are always open.

Much of what I have already discovered and learned along the way has been thanks to my beautiful family and friends and all their love and support! I feel so blessed to have each and every one of you in my life and could not have come this far without your guidance and words of wisdom. The support I have received is so immense and I am constantly in awe of those who give it - thank you.

This birthday is the first one I have had away from home. Whether it be Brantford or Guelph, Ontario has (for the most part) remained my roots. Now in BC, I felt a bit sad that I could not share this day with the people who mean the most to me - but I was happy at the same time because I felt the love and good vibes! Not just from family and friends at home, in Canada, but also from abroad. My birthday gift to myself was to phone my host family in South Africa and speak to them for the first time since I left - and what an amazing gift that was! To hear my host-mother, Pam, scream with delight when she realized who was calling - I could just picture her smiling and it made me smile back. And when Sonke and Nani sang me happy birthday it brought me back to the nights spent in the living room, listening to music and watching them dance and sing together. I wish I could have recorded that moment on the phone and replay it in my head over and over, but it is forever in my memory. So thank you to the Ndinisa's for being so special - you hold a big piece of my heart and I so look forward to the day we can see each other again. I was also surprised by a phone call from a friend in Botswana - Olefile! It meant so much to reconnect with my friends from all over the world today. The people I have met are the reason I travel - each and every person has taught me something new and I can only hope that I am able to continue learning from them and the others I may someday meet!

Mandela Day

Today marks the 93rd birthday of Nelson Mandela, or as he is known by his clan name in South Africa, 'Madiba'. Such an influential and iconic figure to the struggle of apartheid in South Africa, Mandela was a political activist and leader of peace at a crucial time in the country. He represents strength, courage and spirit in SA and is a hero to all. I wanted to post a few things I came across today while thinking about his legacy...

"For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others."

"There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." (This quote is especially true for me and my experience this summer returning to the SOS Children's Village in Tlokweng, Botswana. I am now understanding the depth of my personal growth in the past year since I first experienced the kids at SOS. This place will always hold a special place in my heart and represents many things for me.)

"There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." (I vowed at the end of the program this year to always continue to want more out of life, to never stop learning, and to never settle.)

"I have walked that long road to freedom. I have tried not to falter; I have made missteps along the way. But I have discovered the secret that after climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb. I have taken a moment here to rest, to steal a view of the glorious vista that surrounds me, to look back on the distance I have come. But I can only rest for a moment, for with freedom come responsibilities, and I dare not linger, for my long walk is not ended." (We must continually search out goodness.)

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us: it's in everyone. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

"Where you stand depends on where you sit." (It's all about perspective and I have learned so much from listening to the perspectives of others.)

"No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite."

"Overcoming poverty is not a task of charity, it is an act of justice. Like Slavery and Apartheid, poverty is not natural. It is man-made and it can be overcome and eradicated by the actions of human beings. Sometimes it falls on a generation to be great. YOU can be that great generation. Let your greatness blossom."

"As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison." (What an amazing feat of forgiveness after such horrific and unjustifiable treatment of human beings. This represents the mentality in SA today: forgive but never forget. Amazing.)

"During my lifetime I have dedicated myself to this struggle of the African people. I have fought against white domination, and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die."

--Thank you Nelson!



Above: Taking it all in at the Robben Island Museum
(Photo cred: Maggie Campaigne)



Above: Mandela's cell on Robben Island, the fourth cell from the right

"How was your trip?"

Such a sincerely posed question, those four little words can be so difficult to hear and even harder to answer. And I mean no harm in trying to explain my frustration, I simply want to communicate my experiences to the truest, to the fullest, so that you too may understand and feel what I experienced. But I have come to realize throughout my travels that there is just something about words on a page (or in this case, on a screen) that leave the reader disconnected from the emotions and senses that one gains from being in a particular place - observing the sights, listening to the sounds and smelling the air. So this is where I pause to think, when asked "how was your trip?", about just where I will start and how I will convey the past two months of my life. At what moment do I begin to tell my story - arriving in Cape Town with laughter and fatigue; poppin' the popcorn with Morne; meeting our host families in Khayelitsha (and me being nervous, imagine that?!); the VC (volunteer centre) and Sector Projet guys; walking with Skeezo to and from placement and listening to his perspective on life in SA; Nani playing with my hair and singing to me; the little girl I met at the hip hop event who I will never forget; recognizing the strength and perserverance of the youth at Velokhaya - how amazing their spirit is; visiting places like Robben Island, District 6 and Slave Lodge and having the most uncomfortable feeling just being exposed to the former apartheid system; climbing Table Mountain in the rain and mist and not being able to see just how spectacular it really is; getting caught up in Cape Town and loving life, trying to understand what direction I would be headed in when I got home; the conversations had in Chintsa with David, the revolutionist, anarchist, feminist (wow) who had an entirely refreshing perspective on apartheid and life in South Africa; or meeting Emma, the fellow anthropologist born and raised in SA!; being at one with myself on the beach in Chintsa, at peace with my life thus far, content with everything I have been blessed with; jam sesh in Coffee Bay with drums, guitar and Bob, of course!; arriving back in Botswana - absolutely surreal; reconnecting with Sebaga, tears running down my cheeks as I read her facial expressions and saw that she remembered me!; returning back to Cape Town for one last hoorah; meeting Magda on the plane ride home - she really solidified my experiences, my happiness.

Wow, so I guess that's a start? There is so much in between, so many emotions and so many more stories. But that's life, and it's only just the beginning my friends..



Above: Skeezo, such a great mentor and positive male role model to the youth at Velokhaya





Left: David, in Chintsa

Right: Reconnecting with Sebaga at SOS

Some Reflecting...

My experience in South Africa was (so far) beyond words - I say "so far" because I am freshly back in Canada and still processing the past two months. I have been sitting in bed all day listening to music and going through photos really reflecting on my experience and trying to understand it's impact. South Africa grabbed me and swept me away - such an unbelievably beautiful country with beautiful people, despite its deep and dark past. While in Khayelitsha for the first month I lived with a host family who took me under their wing and showed me (in the brief time I stayed with them) what it was like to live in a township outside Cape Town. Once I actually went to Cape Town and saw it's wealth and beauty, I couldn't believe the disparity in lifestyles between the township and metropolis. The understanding I gained in my short time in South Africa on the apartheid system overwhelmed me. How does anyone justify such brutal systematic racism? It is still something I am grappling with and need to learn more about.



The last two months were filled with so many experiences, of all natures - meeting locals from the township and participating in local community projects, working with NGO's and youth, learning about apartheid from all perspectives - black, white and everything in between, as well as visiting museums like District 6 and Slave Lodge. And then breaking away from team programs and projects to become an independent traveler and put to use the lens I had gained from the program. Meeting other travelers and locals at each backpackers and hearing their perspective on the historical and current political climate in the country, as well as letting loose and just having fun, conversing about life in general and gaining perspective from everyones stories. It was such a whirlwind and I would do it all over again, in fact I really hope to get back to South Africa some day, there's just something about the spirit there...

Oh, the Places You Will Go!

Love and hugs from Botswana - I can't believe I'm back! Crazy the way things work out. I am having such an unreal experience in southern Africa and falling in love with this part of the world.
After saying farewell (but really, "see you later") to our friends and family in Khayelitsha, Dominica, Christina and I spent a week in Cape Town (that place is dangerously addictive!) before hopping on the Baz Bus to travel the coast of South Africa. We stopped in Knysna and Port Elizabeth on the Garden Route, before making our way to the Eastern Cape where we fell in love with the Wild Coast. We spent three nights at a backpackers called 'Buccaneers' in Chintsa and met some absolutely amazing folks. It was paradise and we did some soul searching on the beautiful beach that stretched for miles. We spent our nights meeting locals and other travellers who taught us lots about South Africa and life in general. The conversations we had in Chintsa will stick with me forever - I will tell you all about them when I get back.













Left: Birds of paradise
Right: Our South African friends, Vicky: "fun is fun!"

After Chintsa we headed to a place called Coffee Bay and stayed in a backpackers called 'Coffee Shack' - this place was wild! We met people from all over the world and had a ton of laughs. We walked the hills (and I mean HILLS) of the town, along the beach to get to a place called "hole in the wall", a massive rock in the ocean with a large gap in the middle. When I get back I will tell you more about the town of Coffee Bay - tourism has had some interesting effects on the land and the people. It's really interesting to come in as a tourist after spending time in Khayelitsha doing a community project with locals. The two approaches to travel come with completely different perspectives and emotions, ones that I am sure I will be reflecting on for days to come.











Left: The mighty hills of Coffee Bay
Right: Final Destination "Hole in the Wall"

Once our time in Coffee Bay was up we took a couple buses to get to Botswana. We are staying at the WUSC house (where I stayed last summer) and are on our way to visit the kids and teachers at SOS! I'm beyond excited and can't wait to see Sebaga and all the others. It seems so surreal to me that I am back in this beautiful country, returning to those smiling faces at SOS. It makes me happy to know that I can always come back...

Gaining Perspective

This past weekend our group took a trip into Cape Town (about an hour from the township) to do some sight seeing and experience life in the city. Upon entering Cape Town, there are some immediate thoughts and feelings that come to mind - why only an hour away are so many families living in shantis when the streets of Cape Town are lined with lavish banks and buildings, palm trees, street cleaners and designer stores? I would come to learn a lot more about this discrepancy throughout the day. Our project supervisor for Canada World Youth, Nozuko, organized this trip to Cape Town for us to learn more about the history of South Africa, which is extremely important in order to understand the politics and mindset of the people living here today. Our first stop was a museum called District 6, an experience that really shook me. District 6 is a former district of Cape Town that was destroyed during apartheid. It was home to so many African families who were forcibly removed under the racially segregated system of apartheid. The families left their homes and had to live in tents set up by the government. The museum was filled with street signs that hung to remember life in District 6 before being forced to leave.














While walking through this museum and reading more about the history of South Africa, I experienced so many emotions that I am still trying to process; anger, shame, disbelief and pure sadness among them. One sign in particular really erked me and brought me to tears, it read: "FOR USE BY WHITE PERSONS: THESE PREMISES AND THE AMENITIES THEREOF HAVE BEEN RESERVED FOR THE EXCLUSIVE USE OF WHITE PERSONS. BY ORDER PROVINCIAL SECRETARY".



The rest of the time spent in that museum I felt really angry and ashamed. Although I understand that I wasn't present in South Africa during apartheid, I had gained perspective as to what the colour of my skin represents. It was no longer about who I am as Claire, it was now about how people perceived my white skin. Coming to South Africa for me means different things, like how I want to learn about life in a township, about race relations and just listen to peoples stories and experiences, but for South Africans I represent something completely different than all of that, like privilege. A word I am beginning to dislike - why are some given opportunities while others are physically, mentally and emotionally oppressed? So many questions come to mind each and every day I spend here and I am beginning to learn more not only about the way things were, but about the perspective of South Africans who were either directly impacted by apartheid, or are growing up now learning from their parents and grandparents. The most common story I am hearing is that it is time to move forward from the past - time to unite as one, black, white, coloured, whatever, to create a nation that can forgive and move on to bigger and better things!














"We wish to remember so that we can all, together and by ourselves, rebuild a city which belongs to all of us, in which all of us can live, not as races but as people."

Velokhaya - Cycling for a Purpose

Molweni (hello everyone)! This has to be a quick post, but I really wanted to let everyone know what a great time I'm having here in Khayelitsha. My host family is wonderful!! There are two little ones who I adore and hang out with everyday, as well as two older kids who I am really getting to know quite well. The family is great and I feel really comfortable with them, which is making my time that much better.
I wanted to let everyone know about my placement in Khayelitsha. I am working at an organization called Velokhaya, which is an after school BMX cycling program for kids and youth to get them off the streets and passionate about a healthy alternative. I met the founder of Velokhaya, Amos, who completely lit up when he told us all about how it started as a dream - a way to give back to the community and provide kids with positive mentorship. I couldn't help but stand in awe of his passion for kids and the dedication it has taken him to build this centre from the ground up. He has accomplished so much in 11 years and is an inspiration to the kids!
Please check out the website to learn all about Velokhaya! (Kyle, I wish you were here, you would absolutely love this place) www.velokhaya.co.za
For now, that is all the time I have, but I have lots more to come so please keep checking!
Lots of love and hugs!! xoxo

Off Again!

After an amazing last year in Guelph, I finally completed my undergraduate degree (thanks to the friends and family who got me through)!! It was a great year full of ups and downs, but rewarding nonetheless! I feel really excited and ready to take on whatever lies ahead of me. So guess what? My bags are packed and I'm off to rekindle my love for travel and an area that captured my heart this time last year. I'm participating in another Project Serve International, this time in South Africa. For four weeks I will be staying with a host family in Khayelitsha, a township just outside of Cape Town. The focus of the trip is HIV/AIDS and we will be partnering with Canada World Youth. So far, this is all the information we have and will be finding out our placements when we arrive. After the 4 week program is up, I will be travelling with two other girls around the southern region. This is part of the reason I decided to go on this adventure - I really felt drawn to Botswana, especially the SOS Children's Village I volunteered at last summer. The kids, teachers and everything about that community was so welcoming and loving I couldn't resist returning for a visit! If you want to know more about my experience last year, check out some of the older posts on this blog. And please continue to read up on my journey, as I will be updating this blog from time to time.
I have no idea what awaits me, but I know it is going to be unreal! I CAN'T WAIT!!!!
Lots of love xoxo